How to slowly kill myself

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how to slowly kill myself

How to Slowly Kill Yourself and Others in America by Kiese Laymon

Author and essayist Kiese Laymon is one of the most unique, stirring, and powerful new voices in American writing. How to Slowly Kill Yourself and Others in America is a collection of his essays, touching on subjects ranging from family, race, violence, and celebrity to music, writing, and coming of age in Mississippi. In this collection, Laymon deals in depth with his own personal story, which is filled with trials and reflections that illuminate under-appreciated aspects of contemporary American life. New and unexpected in contemporary American writing, Laymon’s voice mixes the colloquial with the acerbic, while sharp insights and blast-furnace heat calls to mind a black 21st-century Mark Twain. Much like Twain, Laymons writing is steeped in controversial issues both private and public. This collection introduces Laymon as a writer who balances volatile concepts on a razors edge and chops up much-discussed and often-misunderstood topics with his scathing humor and fresh, unexpected takes on the ongoing absurdities, frivolities, and calamities of American life.
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Published 25.03.2019

Suicide Attempt Recorded on Cam: KSRP Constable Seen Consuming Tablets

I was a freshman in college. I was alone in the suite I shared with three other guys. And I was tired.
Kiese Laymon

The Best Way To Kill Yourself

Not sure how or if I've helped many folks say yes to life, but I've definitely aided in a few folks dying slowly in America, all without the aid of a gun' Kiese Laymon grew up in Jackson, Mississippi. That was where he started to write and where he began to seek to create an honest account of living in the US, a country striving to declare itself multi-cultural, post-racial and mostly innocent. This is that account. Drawing on his own personal experiences, these essays are Laymon's attempt to deal with many issues occupying America today, from race, identity and writing to music, celebrity and violence. Through letters between his own disparate family members, pleas to performers whose voices will never be heard again, recollections of his own failure to become a world-famous emcee, analysis of the growing culture of fear in the media and detailed accounts of his clashes with an education system that has both advanced and failed the generation he grew up in, Laymon gets closer not only to the truth behind himself, but to the promises behind the promised land. Searing and passionate, this timely collection of essays introduces a vibrant new voice in US literature and offers a unique insight into the forces that are tearing America apart today.

Your jail anklet saved your life. They should put that in an advertisement. They should get a testimonial from you. I came to in a hospital bed with a sore head. I reached into my hair and felt the staples in my scalp. A handsome young dark-haired doctor with a bushy mustache and brightly lit, amused eyes was standing at the side of my bed conversing cheerfully with me. I seemed to be joining the conversation midstream.

My roommate's white bath towel was soaked in red blood. I'd just tried to kill myself. I was a freshman in college. I was alone in the suite I.
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What it’s like to live with a chronic urge to die.

First described by the French neurologist Jules Cotard in the s, it is usually accompanied by some other debilitating problem, such as major depression, schizophrenia, epilepsy or general paralysis—not to mention disturbing visages in the mirror. Still, call me strange, but I happen to find a certain appeal in the conviction that one is, though otherwise lucid, nevertheless already dead. Provided there were no uncomfortable symptoms of rigor mortis cramping up my hands, nor delusory devils biting at my feet, how liberating it would be to be able to write like a dead man and without that hobbling, hesitating fear of being unblinkingly honest. The author gives us a uniquely detailed glimpse into the intolerable and relentlessly egocentric tunnel vision that is experienced by a genuinely suicidal person. According to Baumeister, there are six primary steps in the escape theory, culminating in a probable suicide when all criteria are met. Note that it is not at all apparent that those at risk of suicide are always aware that they are in fact suicidal, at least in the earliest cognitive manifestations of suicidal ideation. Most people who kill themselves actually lived better-than-average lives.

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